Ever suddenly feel like you’re an alien; as though you are on a strange planet, surrounded by life-forms to which you are completely foreign?
I often feel that way around church folk… One such memory sprung up today.
A few years ago, I was at our church’s Mens Retreat. (For those unfamiliar with such a ritual, the oversimplified version, is that it essentially consists of a bunch of guys, heading to the mountains, for a weekend of grilling meats, studying the Bible, and crying hysterically while singing praise songs, far away from the bewildered stares of girlfriends, spouses and children).
We had just finished up the evening’s session, challenging us all to be,”men of God”. After putting some things in my cabin, I returned to our main gathering area, and saw that on the big screen, (you know, the one that just moments earlier, had contained sugary sweet church song lyrics about wanting to be just like Jesus), were two guys in the Octagon; one kicking the other in the face, the other bleeding profusely from said face.
This carnage was being joyously devoured by a bunch of guys, who just 30 minutes earlier were members of the “Crying Choir”.
“Really?”, I said to those in charge, using both a word and tone of voice that I shuddered to hear coming from my own mouth, “That’s what you choose to put on, during a spiritual retreat?”
There was such a synchronized rolling of eyes in that room, I swear you could hear it. I realized at that moment: I was the alien.
Not being the kind to let unpopularity with the masses concern me, I pressed further. “So, tell me what this has to do with being a man of God?” I asked. ” Just how exactly did Jesus condone this kind of senseless violence?”
Most people got quiet. I couple laughed sarcastically and turned away. A few brave souls did what most Christians do when challenged; they looked for Bible verses to make their point.
One friend, sheepishly shrugged and said halfheartedly, “Well, Paul does say: ‘I beat my body’!”
“That’s it?”, I thought to myself. ” That’s the best a room full of Christian men and Bible scholars could do?” I quickly pointed out that this verse from 1 Corinthians had been violently torn from any semblance of context, but more to the point, I replied, “Yeah, but he didn’t say, ‘I beat someone else’s body.”
Then came silence.
The conversation came to an abrupt and awkward halt after that. I left, and they hit the play button and enjoyed the rest of the bloody spectacle, ironically, much like Romans watching their Christian predecessors run around The Coliseum 2000 years earlier.
Today, Christian gatherings to watch fights, are as common as prayer meetings; they are often church small group social events, where appetizers are served, drinks are filled, and everything is apparently, God-sanctioned.
Even though Jesus’ life and ministry ooze with the message that a violent disciple is an oxymoron, everyone seems fine with it.
What’s most intriguing about all of this, is that the people most passionate about this glorified violence, are often the real Bible-thumpers; the ones who continually use Scripture to point out the ills of every possible segment of society imaginable; the ones who see the Word of God as a lens through which to view everything… well almost everything.
When it comes to something that they happen to enjoy, which The Bible might call into question, they conveniently abandon it, choosing instead to toss it off with a casual, “Nah, I think Jesus would be cool with it.”
Look, this isn’t about the sins of “immoral media”. (I mean, “May he who is without Prince CD’s or The Walking Dead on DVR, cast the first stone, am I right?”). And it isn’t about the evils of MMA. (My son trains at a really great Christian-owned center, which does incredible things for the self-esteem of young people and the needs of the community).
However, it is a huge stretch, for followers of Jesus to act as if the kind of violent pay-per-view events lots of us revel in, have anything redeeming for the soul, or that God somehow would encourage them.
Look, we all have our blind spots, I know. We all watch, ingest, do and listen to stuff that would probably make Jesus turn over our tables in a second.
I don’t propose to police other Christians, or to tell them that they shouldn’t gleefully watch a couple of guys trying to cut-off one another’s oxygen supply for money. (OK, maybe I am doing that).
But more importantly I’m saying: Chokehold-loving Christian, be very careful the next time you use The Bible as a reason to condemn or critique a person, group of people, lifestyle, decision or attitude.
You may find that those you engage in conversation with confound you by ignoring your earnest attempt to convince them. They may laugh sarcastically, roll their eyes, and keep on doing exactly what they’re doing.
And you’ll feel like an alien.
