I know a guy who got straight A’s in school and flunked life. – Mike Yaconelli
Congratulations.
If you’re reading this you made it. You’ve received another day.
But like all days it will be seductive. It will offer you more moments of decision than you can count, and within these moments you will be faced with infinite opportunities to be distracted; to be pulled from the wisest path, to have your focus derailed.
You have this magnificent 24-hour chunk of space and time in which to affirm life and to use it well—and you could so very easily blow it.
Maybe this will help. Here are a few surefire ways to blow it today:
1) Require someone’s permission for joy. Joy is an inside job. It always has been. One of the greatest temptations we face in this life, is to believe that another person is the caretaker of our happiness; that our ability to be joyful in the present is somehow up to anyone else, that we need another’s consent to lightness. No matter what anyone says or does to dishearten you—ultimately you have veto power on being disheartened. You want to blow it today? Give someone something that doesn’t belong to them: your joy.
2) Hold a grudge against yourself. The person you were yesterday no longer exists. He or she can’t do anything in this day, good or bad. Yes, you may have to go about rebuilding some things you’ve broken or begin putting out some fires your past careless words helped start, but you can best do that without the guilt that can paralyze you. Penalize yourself today for yesterday’s failures, and you could easily blow it.
3) Carry weight that is not yours to carry. It’s a really big world, and you are much smaller than you think. There is a great deal that you can and should be concerned with today, but realize what’s beyond your pay grade and out of your jurisdiction. You aren’t responsible for saving the world, only the small portion of it you happen to be standing on in a given moment. Put the massive planet on your tiny shoulders, and you could blow it today.
4) Avoid gratitude. The list of things to be outraged and discouraged by will always be easier to assemble than the list of things to be grateful for, because the former are usually so much louder than the latter. Most of us default to dwelling on all that seems worthy of our complaints; the not enough, the not yet, the stuff we want but don’t have, the things we had but lost. We so rarely dwell on our abundance, on our provision, on our blessing. If you want to blow it today, refuse to cultivate thanksgiving.
5) Avoid silence. Our world is noise. We spend most of our waking moments in the disorienting buzz of all that we think we need; every loud alert, every pressing notification, every urgent scrolling headline that promises us life. We have become dependent on the cheap high of supposed critical information and seemingly useful activity, forgetting that buried beneath it all is a place where the stuff that is real quietly waits. Never find a silent place to hear your own breath and recalibrate your mind today—and you will likely blow it.
6) Believe your reality is everyone’s reality. Compassion is a beautiful, yet dying art. It allows us to see that the way we experience the world, is not the only way there is to experience it. We all live with blind spots of comfort, privilege, and simple good fortune that can obscure the pain and the struggle of those we share space with, and when that happens we can view people with apathy or contempt. Assume that your story is everyone’s story—and you’ll blow it every time.
7) Let someone else define you. People will try and label you today, whether online or in the street or at your church or at your job. They will use what they can see on the surface and they will try and fit you into their the categories, stereotypes, and caricatures they’ve created, because that is easier for them. They will evaluate you from a distance and assume they know you. If you want to blow it today, allow yourself to defined by someone who knows less about you than you do.
8) Compare yourself to anyone else. The greatest myth we inherit in this life is that we are in competition with everyone else; that our resumes, bank accounts, achievements, families, marriages, waistlines, frown lines, and hairlines all exist primarily to be lined up against everyone’s, so that we can evaluate the success, worth, and beauty of our own lives. And since we know ourselves far more intimately than anyone else, this isn’t a fair fight. Compare yourself with the world instead of fully living your specific life—and you’ll blow it every time.
9) Judge someone. People are infuriating. They have no idea what you’ve gone through. They don’t see how hard you’ve worked, the wounds you’ve sustained, the Hell you’ve passed through. No one knows what you sacrificed, what you’ve lost, the grief you carry, the defeats you’ve overcome. They don’t know your story and they have no right to pass judgment or criticize you or dispense damnation. This is as true of every person you see, know, and pass by today. Easily judge another and you will blow it.
10) Give up. Throwing in the towel feels the only response some days, but it never is. Yes, you may need to temporarily withdraw to rest and heal and get your strength, but a permanent pass simply isn’t in the cards, even if you wanted to. The heart is an astoundingly, defiantly, miraculously resilient organ. It has a way of resurrecting itself, even when this seems impossible. If you want to blow it today, give up.
With all its potential pitfalls and trap doors, this day is filled with infinite possibility for beauty and gratitude and joy—and you friend are here for it.
See it.
Touch it.
Step into it.
Dance in it.
Laugh in it.
Seek joy in it.
Be humble in it.
Be grateful in it.
Don’t blow it.
