Dear Mr. Trump,
Watching your body of work over the past years, it seems apparent that no one told you what was expected of you; the things most responsible adults do, the things leaders of nations are supposed to do.
In case you were wondering:
Leaders are supposed to steady people in times of crisis—they aren’t supposed to exacerbate that crisis by impulsively Tweeting out whatever ego-inflating nonsense pops into their heads. And they aren’t supposed to generate crises as distractions, whenever their ineptitude or malfeasance or failure is being exposed.
Leaders are supposed to unite and represent disparate groups of people; and they’re supposed to shield the oppressed groups among them—not manufacture further fear or contempt for those already marginalized because of their gender, color, orientation, religion, physical condition, economic condition, social status. They’re supposed to oppose the bullies, not lock arms with them.
Leaders are supposed to comfort their people in times of tragedy. In the wake of natural disaster, mass murder, loss of life, and national crisis, they’re not supposed to use these moments to pat themselves on the back or fish for compliments or deny responsibility or beg for kudos. When grief and anxiety visit, they’re supposed to be compassionate caregivers, not bragging attention whores.
Leaders are supposed to fiercely steward the truth; to speak without falsehood, because they know that their words have incredible power to bring healing or to cause division, to protect or to do damage. They aren’t supposed to lie without hesitation or shame—and then define and defend those lies as the truth.
Leaders are supposed to de-escalate conflict with other leaders; to be that cooler head that prevails when things become difficult and unpredictable, to be people of restraint and self-control. They aren’t supposed to play chicken on social media, or bluster like an angry toddler wielding nuclear weapons like plastic swords—because leaders realize how many beautiful and fragile human lives hinge upon their emotional maturity.
Leaders are supposed to become the best version of themselves as they lead; to rise to the occasion and to find a decency, humility, and humanity befitting the gravity of the moment. They’re not supposed to keep lowering the bar on what atrocities they’re capable of.
Leaders are supposed to work for their people—hard. They’re supposed to bust their behinds every single day, because leaders understand that serving the American people is an honor and that they shouldn’t treat the Presidency like a personal vacation club, spending one-third of their days playing and profiting.
That’s what leaders are supposed to do.
And though they were surely all greatly flawed in the effort—
it’s what what George H.W. Bush did,
what Bill Clinton did,
what George W. Bush did,
what Barack Obama did.
And it’s certainly what Hillary Clinton would have done, and what your successor will do.
But I realize now that even though it was the hope of me and of hundreds of millions of Americans, it is not what you do, will do, or have the slightest desire to do.
Because you are many things Mr. Trump; a predator, a liar, a bully an opportunist, a huckster, a divider, a traitor, and a fraud.
But you will never be a leader in the way America needs or deserves you to be.
And that’s the saddest part about all of this.
